Tuesday, June 17, 2014

Thanks for the advice

I was standing in the coffee shop this morning, my bandaged toe visible since I decided to wear flip flops, and the woman behind me in line gasped "Ohhhh....what happened there!?" I thought it was a bit dramatic, since the bandage is clean and fresh and was actually put on by a professional at the doctors office. But I just explained to her that, "I broke my foot and crushed a bone in the toe, and now I'm fighting an infection and letting it heal". "Listen, I'm a massage therapist and I work with essential oils and they will penetrate everywhere, and fight any infection. Go down right now and get oregano oil and basil oil and they will prevent anything from ever happening to it." I nodded and expressed my appreciation for her craft, but went on to explain that, "I had been taking antibiotics for 2 weeks, but since it was an open fracture, compounded through the skin and never really able to heal right, the infection had turned into a staph infection, and now I was going to "nuke" it completely with as many harsh antibiotics as I could doing anything humanly possible to avoid what I hope is not already a bone infection...that will mean 6 months on an IV and possible loss of the toe altogether. It's my big toe, I kind of like it and ... "STOP right there!!! The place you need to go to get the oils is right down the street and you need to go see....(trailed off into the space where I don't care to listen anymore because obviously she didn't either)..." But thanks for the advice. I bet the holistic approach is phenomenal, and I don't disagree, but I have mountains to climb and kids to whip at basketball, and a roof to jump off into a pool, so I think I'm going to need that toe. I get it...antibiotics are bad for you. I don't disagree. So is a staph infection...in fact it fucking hurts, and I'm done messing around, so please...enjoy your coffee, and your oils, and do me a favor if you ever have kids: VACCINATE THEM, and GIVE THEM THEIR SHOTS!! Read up on CDC for 15 minutes some time. And probably just have a nice day because I'm in a lot of pain, and not the most pleasant person to be around.

Monday, June 16, 2014

I know I have a lot to learn. I hope for a new opportunity every day. I'm trying very hard to let go of anger and I'm aware that it's a necessary step at this point of my life. 

And there is pain I must feel. I've been very humbled lately and I'm now confronted with the possibility of losing a piece of me permanently and I know that there's a lesson in it. Whether I lose it or get to keep it I'm not going to pass through this fire and this pain without learning this one thing. Once and for all. 

I deserve happiness. We all do. 

Thursday, June 5, 2014

And now you can rest

Bodie was really the best dog I have ever had in my life. What he has meant to me and my kids has been discussed here on the blog, and in other spots you might find me. But he is worthy of a much longer, more detailed, heartfelt post that I haven't had the time or the emotional strength to write quite yet.

But Sean and I put him down together earlier this week, and I wanted to mark this important time on my blog because he deserves it and so much more.

We miss you, Bodie. We love you, Good Boy.