Tuesday, October 25, 2011


I've been pulling late hours, and only breaking off from the grind here and there to charge the batteries in the typical ways. This evening, I was lucky enough to decide to take pause long enough to hit Sean's karate class for a half hour, and my batteries are full again.

This kid is a fucking animal.

I walked in to a class that was based on some aerial training. The class was stacking pads on the ground and lining up to see who could go the highest, by pulling a front flip over the stack and landing on the matt behind them. Visual reference below. Well, as the line thinned out, and Sean was the last little man standing, he kept going higher and higher, only finally (barely) tipping the stack when it reached 7 pads high, and was easily 6 inches taller than him.

Then he put on a clinic based on learning how to do handless cartwheels over the pads on the ground...which he has never tried until tonight.

Dude kills me.

And he does it all with the most joyful, beautiful smile in his heart and on his face.

Love is an understatement. I am in awe.

Monday, October 24, 2011

Time Out

It wasn't always so complicated. There was a time when it came naturally. It was unlearned. I've had it so many times. It's one of those things...

Where would I be without the wellspring of memories? 

Who would I be without the experiences that tempered the animal inside?

Who would I have missed were it not for the grand design in all things? 

Lost, and further even than I am now, down the road we all travel, to the end we all find.

I don't know who said it first, but I remember the guy that reminded me about 15 years ago; "Count your blessings. It helps." It's true. When I do, that the list can be long and full of surprises, and I often find my mindset changed from then to now.

I've been in and out of the thought process all day today. It began as the sun rose, on my way into the day I passed by a man sitting curbside waiting for the bus. It was cold out this morning, and I wasn't upset about it...turning the heater on in my car was a luxury I hadn't tapped into for months. And as I went to reach for it, and saw the man sitting on the cold concrete sidewalk, I realized that I am lucky. I have it pretty good. It may not last forever, and I think it's a good idea to pay attention to these little wonderful things I take for granted every day. Like the shelter over my head, the food in my stomach, the knowledge that the two angels in the picture above have closed their eyes and drifted into dreamland, resting to attack another day at elementary school with joy and abandon, and love for each other and the world. 

I want to stay in the place I found this morning. I want to live in the gratitude that multiplies itself exponentially. I want to be rewarded for the feeling with more of itself. And these days it takes making an inventory of the little things that keep me there. 

The weight of the world is something we all shoulder. As parents we take on more than our share so that the burden our children will face can come gradually, easily, calmly and with training about proper form, balance, and knowledge that it's possible. 

How amazing were the people in my life that have carried a piece of my own. How strong are the shoulders that surrounded me, that have brushed up against mine. How perfect are the little ones I look down upon today, already growing and strong in love and faith. 

It's a beautiful mystery, this life. I am so confused and so awestruck every day. I am so grateful for the many voices that speak out to me in passing moments, with a smile, or a reflection. This world is all a reflection of the people who we are. To look into the faces of the two most perfect little people that I have ever known is as close to God as I have ever imagined being, and the message that is communicated the most perfect form of love from any power I have ever known. To think that I may have been a vessel of that same message to those around me at any time is a validation of my own life. 

I'm blessed. 

Thanks to my family and my friends, for loving me, and allowing me to love you. Thanks to my children, should you ever read this blog some day when you too know what it's like to struggle and cry, and to wonder where the place is that you got away from, where you felt thankful and good. May you find some piece of comfort in the words that I have for you both: I love you more than life itself. You are the reason I am here. You are perfect. Never have I seen such loving, caring, sensitive and considerate human beings. You are already more amazing to me than anyone I've ever met, and I know that you will do whatever, and go wherever you want in this world. Stay true to your hearts, for they are absolutely in the right place, and it's a quality that you were simply born with, so it will always, always be there even when it seems like it's not, or it escapes you for a moment. You are loved by so many, yet you give so much more back to us all. You are beautiful. 

You know you want it

Everybody loves a moustache ride:


Click the link.

Join my team.

Fight evil.

Get some.

Saturday, October 22, 2011

Dragon Form

It may be a kids "black belt", but this process that Sean has gone through has been fundamentally awesome, for his confidence, his strength, his being. He has worked very hard to get this far, and continues to prove to me that he is simply the coolest dude I know.

So proud.


Sunday, October 9, 2011

It's Baby Simple

I decided that this phone call I got about a year ago should be shared with the world. I only wish I would have recorded the first half of the call, but how could I have known when that phone rang that I was going to be involved in such a huge opportunity!?


Latest tracks by BLCC

Saturday, October 8, 2011

The grapes are like a mouthpiece

After the game....

Ireland: Do you know that girl Sofia?

Me: Yeah, her daddy is a friend of mine.

I: She's my best best best friend on soccer.

M: That's great. She's also very aggressive on the field.

I: What does that mean?

M: It means she really wants the ball and goes and gets it.

I: I really want the ball all the time too!

M: That's good, Sis, you just have to go straight to it as fast as...

I: I call that car!

M: Ok.

I: Did you know that there's a car called 7-up?

M: What?

I: Just kidding.

I think she's really picking up on the finer points of the game.

Friday, October 7, 2011

It's a contest

So I volunteered to work at the 30th annual Jesse Beck Scarecrow Contest this afternoon. It's a big carnival type of event on the playground at my kids' elementary school. Having been a Roy Gomm Gopher myself, I never really participated in the event as a child, but many of my best friends did. It's a little bit like our version: Gopher Fun Day, but with a fall theme, face painting, kids running around hopped up on sugar, and carnival games all over the place.

I worked the basketball shot booth, which was just a big board with 3 little hoops on it, and for two tickets, any kid could shoot 3 times, to win a variety of swag. My kids came over and paid me a visit while I was there.

They didn't have any fun, as you can tell from their faces and the snow cone.

Actually, none of the kids had any fun today. It was pretty much one big sad, dramatic mess. Every time a kid came up to my booth, I took his or her two tickets, gave them the 3 balls, and if they made 2 I was sure to swat away the 3rd shot so that they couldn't win a mini gumball machine, which was the coveted grand prize.

The way I see it, these kids gotta learn what it's like in the real world some time. They have to know that just when they think they are about to win, someone might come along and block their best shot, and then knock them down and steal their bag full of candy and yo-yo's. Oh yeah, I totally got hooked up today. It was actually a pretty good day for me, except for having to clean up dirt and tears off the sleeve of my favorite sweater. But I'll probably have it dry cleaned, and I don't mind spoiling myself, because one of the parents wasn't paying attention, and left her purse lying right behind the bean-bag-toss booth, and I helped myself to a little somethin' somethin'...compensation, I think, for the hour and a half I took off of work. She only had $20 in her wallet anyway, so it's not like I did any serious damage...except maybe to her evening, as I grabbed the BMW keys that were in there too, and looked around for at least 4 minutes in the parking lot for that stupid car, but gave up and tossed them in a bush, and just took my own car back to the office instead. Oh well, it would have been sweet. Your welcome for not taking your car, lady. Man, I have some bad indigestion right now from all of the candy I ate. But I felt it was my duty to teach those kids that they need to start hitting the weights and stand up for themselves with some conviction next time. It's a tough job being a parent, but I take it very, very seriously.

Trick or Treat, I love Halloween!

Oh and kids, if you're reading this: I'm just having a little fun with creative writing. I didn't do most of that stuff. This is called exaggeration, although it might actually be what my therapist calls deflection, as I did really grab one of the little mini gummy-hamburger prizes out of the prize bucket and ate it. But thinking about all of that other stuff I COULD have done, it doesn't really seem so bad now, does it?

What!? I was HUNGRY!!


What a DOLL

My niece is now a blogger.


Be sure to check out Molly's Blog and leave a comment. She loves comments.

It's not like Molly, her older brother Jeffrey, my 7 year old son Sean, or any other kid with the skills to find this blog wouldn't already be completely traumatized by some of the content/language/great choices I've made to date, but it really sunk in a little deeper today when I stumbled upon her blog.

Oh well. These kids gotta know.

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

This is life

Sometimes I need to be reminded that this path does work for people.


Thanks, Google.

Saturday, October 1, 2011

I had this dream last night...

...I was on a plane, sitting in the back with my Grandma Egan. We were coming back to Reno from somewhere far away, and there was supposed to be a connection in Vegas. As we flew in to Sin City, I looked out the window and could only see the very tips of the buildings because there was a thick cloud cover or fog cover over the ground. One building stood out above the rest: it was tall like the Transamerica building, but on the very top sat a large, ornate castle.. All of the sudden, instead of descending and landing, the plane started to climb steeply and bank into the ascent. I figured that the cover meant that we couldn't land in Vegas, and that there must be enough fuel to just go straight to Reno and not deal with it. I turned away from the window to talk to Grandma, and to my joyous surprise, Grandpa was sitting next to her. His arm was around her and she was snuggled up against him and smiling and they were both so very happy. It was the kind of happiness and joy that dances with an emotional bend in my earliest childhood memories. He told her "I love you" and she told him "I love you" back and they kissed and smiled and continued to sit together as the plane continued to climb.

The dream changed direction, and I was back to earth again, grounded, working, battling. But that's a whole different story, and I just thought I would share the happier moments of what I got into last night.